Monday, May 12, 2008

Eye of pinhead, toe of moron


Florida Teacher Accused Of Wizardry - Man Made Toothpick Vanish In Class

LAND 'O LAKES, Fla. -- A substitute teacher in Pasco County has lost his job after being accused of wizardry.

Teacher Jim Piculas does a magic trick where a toothpick disappears and then reappears.

Piculas recently did the 30-second trick in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes.

Piculas said he then got a call from the supervisor of teachers, saying he'd been accused of wizardry.

"I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue, you can't take any more assignments you need to come in right away,'" he said.

Let's see if we understand this correctly...The year is 2008, and a sub does a magic trick involving a toothpick in front of a class - And he gets accused of wizardry, the charges taken credulously by the supervisor of teachers...?

It certainly is comforting to know that in these trying times, some Americans are steadfast in their opposition to the advances of the 8th century.

Perhaps pricking this magical miscreant with a pin to find a 'dead spot' upon his person might resolve the issue satisfactorily, and if found guilty (as he no doubt is in a place where predetermined conclusions based on towering ignorance reign supreme over mere trifles such as logic and reason), then mete he be punished in a maximal fashion for polluting precious bodily fluids with his warlockery most foul.

...and give that naughty Harry Potter a spin in the dunk tank while you're at it, too.