Thursday, January 29, 2009

Television rules the nation

Press conference I'd like Pres. Obama to have:
In the spirit of bi-partisanship, I invited the Senate and congressional Republican leadership to meet with me and my advisors to discuss the stimulus bill we submitted. We had coffee, diet Coke, and some pleasant salty snacks. The discussion was cordial, and I even added some tax cuts the Republicans asked for, in an effort to include at least a tiny bit of their failed policies.

That said, the vote yesterday was largely along party lines, and not one Republican voted for the bill. That, surprisingly, was the first time in my memory that Republicans voted against a tax cut. I knew this was likely, and I wanted to prove to the American people that the Republicans, at long last, have no true core principles except to be obstructionists and enrich their wealthy supporters.

In fact, the new RNC chair, Rush Limbaugh, has called publicly for my failure as your President, and by extension the failure of America.

Now that the true face of the Republican Party has been exposed, I plan to have nothing further to do with these asshat motherfuckers, and not one of those bastards will ever be invited to my White House again. Unless they apologize to me and the American people, those cocksuckers can stick their heads up each others asses, rot in the sun, and die.

Thank you, and God bless America.

One can only dream.