Not just news, it's Farking news!*

What's da matta wit Brooklyn!?

Ex-city cop wins huge award after chair he sat in broke, sending bullet into his knee

Former New York City Detective Anderson Alexander was sitting in it in Brooklyn's 73rd Precinct on Jan. 1, 2002, when his partner handed him his gun so the partner could interview a suspect.

Alexander leaned back to put the gun in his waistband, but the back of the chair gave way, his finger slipped and the 9-mm. Smith & Wesson fired a bullet into his left knee.
[...]
"This case is not about him shooting himself," Alexander's lawyer Matthew Maiorana told the Daily News. "This case is about a broken chair and an unsafe workplace.
[...]
Alexander, 49, who retired on a three-quarters-pay disability pension, moved to South Carolina, where he works as a sheriff's deputy. He declined comment.
[...]
Alexander made more than $90,000 a year before he retired, including overtime.

Safety off and a chambered round is a recipe for disaster!

Brooklyn cops can make $90k a year!?

$4.5 MILLION for being an unsafe idiot!!!

A disability so bad he gets 3/4 pension ... but well enough to join another police force!!!!

What professional stuffs a gun in his waistband while sitting at his desk when he could just put it in a drawer? He shouldn't get squat, except maybe a Darwin Award.
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The Cane Mutiny!

Man wielding plastic candy cane subdues attacker

Police spokesman Sgt. Norm Leong says the man used the two-foot-tall plastic ornament to subdue the attacker until officers arrived.

He says the 49-year-old suspect became intoxicated, went over to a neighbor's home on Thanksgiving and began waving a kitchen knife at people gathered on the lawn.

He cut several peoples' clothing before one of them decided to fight back.

Police say the man with the knife was arrested on suspicion of assault with a deadly weapon. The guest who took up the candy cane was not arrested because police determined he acted in self-defense.

Sounds like he got a Frosty reception.
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Moving up we have

Lawmaker to Homeland Security: Don't forget to credit God for keeping Kentuckians safe

A lawmaker is upset with his state's Department of Homeland Security for its lack of credit to a "higher power" for its work in protecting the state's citizens.

Kentucky State Rep. Tom Riner, a Southern Baptist minister who helped establish a requirement that the federally funded agency credit God with keeping the state safe, is upset that under Gov. Steve Beshear, the department's 2008 annual report did not do so.
[...]
Among the requirements of the 2006 anti-terror law is that a plaque be placed in the department's Emergency Operations Center. Part of the statement on the plaque reads: "The safety and security of the Commonwealth cannot be achieved apart from reliance upon Almighty God."

Yeeeees, because god has worked so well in protecting people, excluding his son of course.

Dude, your 'kingdom' is in heaven, I suggest that Rep Riner (R-U stupid) pray in one hand and defecate in the other. See which one is full of the lord's loving bounty first. Oh, and read the Constitution, 1st amendment.
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Your DHS at work AKA FearFactor:

TSA ads aim to get fliers on board with security measures

A passenger focus group conducted for TSA by New York City business consulting firm Blue Lime found that "unquestioning compliance has diminished." Passengers say they are more afraid of missing their flight than they are of an airplane being attacked, the 73-page Blue Lime report found.

In a 97-second video, Washington National Airport screener Stephanie Naar gently explains that homemade bombs "are the No. 1 threat to aircraft, and we know terrorists have concealed these items in shoes."

So they use our tax dollars to say "homemade bombs "are the No. 1 threat to aircraft."

Ummm, no, no and a resounding NO!

The major threats to aircraft & travelers are bad inspections and lax enforcement of standards in the FAA as decreed by Bush et al.

Of course the prize statement the TSA propaganda video is "unquestioning compliance has diminished" 'Unquestioning compliance' is only called for by tyrants.
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And speaking of tyrants:

State justice confirms he yelled "Tyrant!" at Mukasey before AG collapsed

Richard Sanders, a justice on the Washington State Supreme Court, has never been one to shy from controversy or blunt language. And last week, as he sat at a Federalist Society dinner and listened to Attorney General Michael Mukasey, Sanders reached his tipping point.

After listening to Mukasey defend the Bush administration's counterterrorism policies — its detainment practices at Guantánamo Bay, its interpretation of the Geneva Conventions' reach — Sanders stood and shouted "Tyrant! You are a tyrant!"
[...]
In his speech, Mukasey said that almost every article in the treaty is "plainly addressed to armed conflicts among the nations that signed the Conventions. It is hardly surprising that the United States concluded that those provisions would not apply to the armed conflict against al-Qaida, an international terrorist group and not, the last time I checked, a signatory to the Conventions."

Sanders, on Tuesday, said that being a signatory was beside the point. "I didn't sign the Geneva Conventions, you didn't sign the Geneva Conventions, but the United States did sign the Conventions. And that's the point, isn't it?"

He also took umbrage at the Bush administration's detention policies at Guantánamo Bay in Cuba, saying: "I think it's a disgrace to hold people without charge, without trial, to hold them incommunicado."

My hero!


* These stories aren't all from Fark, but they could be!



Cross posted at VidiotSpeak